


Meeting the Kitans

by Melime



Category: The Orville (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Humor, Meeting the Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-18 00:54:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29109642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melime/pseuds/Melime
Summary: Alara wants to introduce her girlfriend to her parents. They try to be nice and not insult anyone's intelligence, but old habits die hard.
Relationships: Alara Kitan/Kelly Grayson
Kudos: 5
Collections: Small Fandoms Fest





	Meeting the Kitans

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Português brasileiro available: [Conhecendo os Kitan](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29109651) by [Melime GreenLeaf (Melime)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melime/pseuds/Melime%20GreenLeaf)



> Written for the Small Fandom Fest, prompt: "Orville, The, Alara/Any Female Character, Alara introduces her girlfriend to her family".

Alara wished her family didn’t have that uncanny ability to make her feel inadequate. They didn’t even have to try, or say anything, for her to feel that dread crawling under her skin. At least they weren’t actively trying to make her feel bad, her gravity sickness and initial recovery in Xelaya allowed for some reconciliation, even if she ultimately decided to return to the Orville. Her father could now go through almost an entire conversation without insulting her intelligence. If he could refrain from insulting other people’s intelligence remained to be seen.

“Any last minute tips?” Kelly asked, coming out of the bathroom after finishing her makeup.

“Xelayan tequila. There's a reason why Xelaya is known for producing some of the best alcohol in the Union, and that reason is family dinners."

"Contrary to what you might believe, family conflict isn't exclusive to Xelayans."

"No, but only on Xelaya dating a first officer is considered settling. My parents still believe no one without a PhD is considered proper dinner company. Try not to get offended when they insult your intelligence, they're trying."

Kelly smiled. "Don't worry, I know a thing or two about judgmental parents. I’m sure they’ll love me.”

“They won’t, but they only have three hours at the station, so hopefully they can’t do too much damage.”

“If they do, we can always fake an emergency, those always work.”

-

On the far corners of the galaxy, there lived a race called Vermillians. They were known for two things: one, being absolutely fantastic at origami, and two, dying of embarrassment. Even minor embarrassments could make their blood boil, and if the embarrassment persisted, they could cook from the inside within minutes. That all but guaranteed that they couldn’t have any contact with other species, since a diplomatic incident in which their king was killed after an Union ensign pointed out he had a piece of lettuce on his tooth.

Alara almost hoped she had some Vermillian blood in her, at least then there would be an end in sight for her torture.

“So Union officers require no superior education?” Ildis asked.

“Well, we complete our education at Union Point, which serves both as military training and a higher education academy. It offers a variety of courses, I myself took electives in diplomacy and a year in international law,” Kelly said, having the grace not to be offended.

“Wow, a whole year? I suppose that makes you nearly a lawyer by Earth standards.”

“Ildis, don’t be mean,” Drenala said. “There’s nothing wrong with lawyers, even if it’s not a proper academic endeavor.”

“Mom, dad, please stop. Kelly is the first officer of an exploratory Union vessel.”

“So nothing academic of note?” he asked.

“I was the Spelling Bee regional vice champion in ‘97,” Kelly joked.

Ildis turned to his wife. “I’ve heard about this, among humans the ability to properly spell words in their own language is considered a rare skill worthy of praise.”

“Dad! You promised you wouldn’t do this.”

Kelly put a hand over hers. “It’s ok, I know it sounds odd for outsiders. Most humans find it odd too, it’s just an old American tradition that spread, but it’s still only played in English.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend. I’m sure it’s a… fun game.”

“This would be him trying to be nice,” Alara said.

Honestly, it was to be expected. Even if her father wasn’t actively trying to insult people for their intelligence, it was just something that came naturally to him. The whole supporting father routine was new to him, he was still adapting.

“I’m sorry, dear, we just never imagined you dating a human, much less one in the military. They have a certain reputation,” Drenala said.

“If this is about me joining the military again, I thought we’ve been through this already.”

“We have, it’s just that we want to make sure you are not settling because of your own… inadequacies,” Ildis said. “You wanted us to be supportive, so we just want to make sure you understand your options.”

“I know my options, I would rather you respected my choices,” she said, nearly yelling. This had been a terrible idea, her relationship with her family was still healing, and being judgmental wasn’t exactly the kind of thing people got over immediately.

“Anyone’s seen the game last night?” Kelly asked in a cheery voice, obviously trying to change the subject.

“We do, we just want what is best for you,” Drenala said.

“And, we want to be supportive too, we’ve talked about that,” Ildis said.

Alara dropped her head to the table, gentle enough not to break it, although she did hear a couple glasses dropping. She wondered if Kelly was serious about faking an emergency, one of those would come in handy right about then.

“I heard they have a good wine selection here,” Kelly tried again.

Would wishing for a Kree attack be too much? Maybe an oxygen leak?

“Ask them if they carry any poisons,” Alara muttered.

“Now that’s an overreaction, will you please behave?” Ildis said.

Alara was about to give him an impolite answer when their wrist communicators beeped at the same time.

“Commander Grayson, lieutenant Kitan, we need you. It’s kinda urgent, but not a complete emergency, like, no need to run or anything, but maybe a light sprint,” Gordon said.

She nearly jumped off the chair. “I’m sorry, but we have to go, it could be an emergency.”

“It was nice meeting you,” Kelly said, standing as well. She extended her hand, but neither of them shook it.

“Yes, it was… nice to meet you. I hope we’ll have another opportunity to finish this.”

After that, they couldn’t leave fast enough.

“I think that went well,” Kelly said, as soon as they were out of earshot.

“Did we go to the same dinner?” Alara laughed, then, in a more serious tone, she said, “I’m sorry for what they said, they’re trying.”

“Don’t worry about that, I was expecting worse.”

“Still, it was a good idea, asking Gordon to call in an emergency.”

Kelly stopped. “I didn’t ask him, I thought you did.”

“No, I…”

They looked at each other.

“Wait, so this is a real emergency?”

The lights started to flicker. Maybe she shouldn’t have hoped for an attack.


End file.
